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Capitals player headlocks and slams Evgeni Malkin to start a hockey brawl

Please do not touch Braden Holtby.

Sure, you had your typical scraps here and there. Tom Sestito and Tom Wilson punched each other.

But then the hostilities crossed over from pugilism to something just ... weird. I can’t explain why, but for some reason Capitals winger Justin Williams decided to put Evgeni Malkin in a headlock and flip him onto the ice.

I don’t know. Luckily nobody was hurt!

UPDATE: Ah, yes. Malkin spoke to reporters after the game, and he correctly guesses that it was for whacking Holtby’s glove as he drove by.

I guess I missed that part because of how quickly Williams reacted to it. It wasn’t even a half-second before retaliation was in order. Williams’ hockey programming is already running at maximum efficiency!