The Denver Broncos -- most of them, anyway -- are being honored at the White House on Monday for their victory in Super Bowl 50. It's not easy for us non-Super Bowl winners to get a personal tour of the White House, but at least thanks to social media, we can live vicariously through the Broncos.
Wade Phillips has been lauded for his defensive schemes, but his real genius lies in how he uses Twitter. So who better to give us our very own, and very literal, White House tour than the Broncos' 68-year-old defensive coordinator?
A look at one side of the White House
I watch Veep, so I'm fairly certain this is actually the backyard of the White House. But it's OK, let's move on. You'll do better the next time, Wade.
Freshly cut grass
I'm no landscaper, but we know there's a house and that looks like grass. Pretty sure that's all you need to classify this as a lawn. Much better, Wade!
George Washington sword pic.twitter.com/hK92sbueVB— Wade Phillips (@sonofbum) June 6, 2016
Wade, the front/back mixup is in the past. We know you're not going to lie to us. This looks pointy and old so we'll believe you when you say it belonged to the father of our country.
For the red staters
Red Room pic.twitter.com/7otbnaYRy1— Wade Phillips (@sonofbum) June 6, 2016
For the color blind, I can tell you there's a lot of red in this room.
For the blue staters
Blue Room pic.twitter.com/w2Dyyk61za— Wade Phillips (@sonofbum) June 6, 2016
It's got walls and some blue trim. Verdict says: blue room.
The East Room pic.twitter.com/qka8W3DIvo— Wade Phillips (@sonofbum) June 6, 2016
I am terrible with directions. Let's just say this is indeed a room in the east wing.
Ben Franklin Room pic.twitter.com/ddJ0IAmGon— Wade Phillips (@sonofbum) June 6, 2016
Not to "well actually" you Wade, but this is called the Benjamin Franklin State Dining Room. Still a cool pic, though.
Profiles in Courage
JFK-neat pic.twitter.com/YoZ5bExOf3— Wade Phillips (@sonofbum) June 6, 2016
That is the famous portrait of the 35th president of the United States. And you know what? Wade's right. He's not too cool to admit that it's a neat experience to visit the White House and see these iconic pieces of American history up close.
* * *
Thanks for the tour, Wade. You kept it simple and straightforward and we appreciate the--oh, no, what is this
Can't wait to meet the President.i know he is a Denver fan. With a name like Bronc Obama , he has to be!— Wade Phillips (@sonofbum) June 6, 2016
Secret Service, escort this man out, please.