Reports emerged on Monday that Neymar would be releasing a song from an upcoming album. Immediately interest was piqued at what kind of train wreck it would be. Let’s be real: When athletes become musicians it’s normally horrible, except for Shaquille O’Neal’s 1993 song “(I Know I Got) Skillz,” which is the greatest piece of music in human history — but I digress.
So, Neymar told everyone to watch his Facebook page on Wednesday for his first song to drop, and we got this. It’s okay if you don’t speak Portugese, because here’s a translation of the horrible song.
To play the ball I need boldness and joy. To play the ball I need boldness and joy, to be be with the fates, to be with the fates. É 'tois'. É 'tois'. É 'tois'
What the hell does that mean?
Well, nothing — not really. This is all an elaborate inside joke between Neymar and Brazilian singer Thiaguinho. In 2013 Thiaguinho started a craze by making the letter “T” with his arms during concerts, which Neymar adopted as a goal celebration.
It stood for “trois,” meaning “us,” and was designed to refer to the singer and soccer player thinking alike. They even developed a motto together: boldness and joy. Recognize that from the song?
Wait ... so did Neymar just attract the attention of the world to make a joke with his friend?
So, there’s no real album?
Judging from the song, hopefully not.