Le’Veon Bell’s got plenty of time on his hands now that the Steelers are in full offseason mode a week removed from losing in the AFC Championship to the Patriots. With all of his free time, Le’Veon made a diss track under his rap alias “Juice” and went in on former ESPN First Take and now FS1’s Undisputed hot-take flamethrower Skip Bayless on a track called “Shrimp Bayless.”
The track starts with an echoing Skip Bayless and Shannon Sharpe, Bayless’ co-personality on Undisputed. The buildup of the track continues, and peaks with Sharpe yelling, “HIT THE HOLE, LE’VEON!” I’m not even sure what it is about that, but it sounds so damn good. Or funny. Or both.
Then the song gets into the bars, referring to Skip as “Shrimp” Bayless. Some were better than others, but we ranked the sports references among them.
7. "I'm known to tote the rock and I don't mean Dwayne Johnson"
Every rapper, athlete or non-athlete, has to fill space with short and obvious references like this one. It’s good, it’s fine, it’s not one of the better ones.
6. “Shrimps they talkin’ about me, like I’m Odell on the beat”
OBJ references are pretty common in hip hop nowadays. I’m going to give Le’Veon credit assuming that he’s aware of this, and it’s better than the Dwayne Johnson one. OBJ is always on the beat with his dances, whether he’s doing the whip or busting out some Michael Jackson moves.
He was on the beat, like Odell.
5. "I'm like Steph, I'm not missing"
The track seems good for a pro athlete, and overall we’ll call this track a win. Also, like OBJ references, Steph Curry mentions are more common too, though Drake takes it further than anyone else.
And well, Steph doesn’t really miss.
4. “You love Jerry way too much, you acting like y'all related"
Le’Veon’s pointing out how Skip is obsessed with Cowboys owner Jerry Jones. There are few things that you can do as a greater diss to a man than saying they’re obsessed over another human being. Nobody likes being slandered like that, and if they say otherwise they’re full of it.
Skip is notoriously an obnoxiously huge fan of the Dallas Cowboys, and Le’Veon goes right for the gut with this one.
3. "You keep talking all that nonsense I'm gonna call Richard Sherm”
Le’Veon led in with, “Sometimes I hate that you breathin’, think you sick as a germ.” The play on Richard Sherman’s name is cool, but the reference because of the heated history between Sherman and Bayless is even better. Also — woo buddy — to say that you hate that the man is breathing is STRONG!
If there was any question about the amount of dislike he had for Bayless, that was answered here.
2. “Guess the only way you’ll like me is if I play for the Spurs”
The track wouldn’t have been complete without a Spurs mention, and Le’Veon is on point when he says this. It’s hard to decipher who Skip loves more, his Spurs or his Cowboys.
He went Salt Bae on us with this near the end. The perfect touch.
1. “Deflate ya just like I’m Brady”
HE WENT THERE!!!!!!!! (He also probably gave these embrace debate shows something to talk about Tuesday morning.)
The track was a banger, too. Even by Skip’s standards:
With 116,000 downloads (as of this tweet), @L_Bell26's "Shrimp Bayless" track has more viewers than @RealSkipBayless averaged last week.— Richard Deitsch (@richarddeitsch) January 31, 2017
Le’Veon was pretty happy about hearing this news:
January 31, 2017
Well done, Le’Veon.