LaVar Ball — outspoken Sports Dad for Lonzo, LiAngelo, and LaMelo — thinks he could have beaten Michael Jordan one-on-one back in his prime. Of course he does! This is the same Sports Dad who believes Lonzo is better than Stephen Curry and said he would “only” play for the Lakers. (He walked that last one back a little recently.)
“Back in my heyday, I would kill Michael Jordan one-on-one,’’ Ball told USA TODAY Sports. “I would just back him in and lift him off the ground and call a foul every time he fouls me when I do a jump hook to the right or the left. He cannot stop me one-on-one. He better make every shot ’cause he can’t go around me. He’s not fast enough. And he can only make so many shots outside before I make every bucket under the rim.”
It’s like we’ve always said: Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player to ever play, except for LaVar Ball. I mean, of course! Who cares if Superman can fly at the speed of sound and possess impossible strength — he still gets neutered by kryptonite. Maybe Ball knows something we don’t.
After high school, Ball played one season in college: in 1987-88 for Washington State, where he averaged 2.2 points and 2.3 rebounds. He transferred in search for more playing time, but apparently didn’t get it — those are his only recorded statistics. That same season, it should be noted, Jordan averaged 35 points for the Chicago Bulls.
Yes, LaVar Ball is ridiculous, brash, outspoken, absurd, and comically unaware of what he’s saying. He also suggested in the interview that shoe companies wanting to sign his sons should give his family $1 billion for the marketing rights.
“A billion dollars, it has to be there,” Ball said in the same interview. “That’s our number, a billion, straight out of the gate. And you don’t even have to give it to me all up front. Give us $100 mil over 10 years.”
But he’s a good Sports Dad because he does honestly care about his kids, even if his words are a bit outlandish.