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Vladimir Guerrero, Jr. can hit an opposite-field homer off a tee whenever he wants, and I’m going to start drinking at noon

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No one teenager should have all that power.

SiriusXM All-Star Futures Game Photo by Rob Carr/Getty Images

We’ve already established that Vladimir Guerrero, Hall of Famer, has a son with the same name, and that this son might be even better. Guerrero, Jr. just turned 19 — as in, a month ago — yet he’s already demolishing Double-A and threatening to force his way onto the Blue Jays’ roster.

In the meantime, he’s doing segments with MLB Network, and this seems ... post-human:

When I was 19, I was not hitting opposite-field home runs off a tee. When Ted Williams was 19, he was not hitting opposite-field home runs off a tee. Nobody should be hitting opposite-field home runs off a tee. We are all reduced to being a living blinking-guy meme, as we start the video up from the beginning.

Let us not forget that he was essentially saying, “Here I go, about to hit an opposite-field home run off a tee, which is completely normal for me. Are your cameras on?”

The world will have to get used to Vladimir Guerrero, Jr. soon enough. Watching this video is like sticking your foot into the hot tub. It hurts at first, but it will help you adjust later.