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The 26 letters of the alphabet, ranked

ABC? Eh.

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Hey, I’ve got an isolation blog for all of you lovely people of Al Gore’s internet.

People have ranked the letters of the alphabet in the past, but this is the definitive ranking. I couldn’t tell you why, but it is. A few notes are attached (sensical or not). Otherwise, where you see a letter is simply where it belongs.

26. K

Generally not a good looking letter, and not a lot of cool words or names that come along with it. It’s a wannabe C.

25. H

Not spicy, no flavor to it.

24. Q

Too difficult to use.

23. P

A fine letter, but whatever.

22. Z

Cool if you get to dunk on somebody with it in Scrabble or Words With Friends. Otherwise, whatever.

21. I

It’s a word and also a letter. Cool.

20. B

Good sounding letter.

19. D

Same as B, but better.

18. M

Useful, can be a reaction as in “mmmm.”

17. O

A letter, a word, a reaction, a symbol.

16. J

Just a good letter.

15. G

Putting this ahead of J just because you should say “GIF” with a hard G.

14. Y

Ends a lot of words.

13. U

A turn, can be a useful shorthand or help communicate sarcasm in a text message.

12. V

Flying ducks formation, generally cool sounding letter.

11. X

Looks cool, can be used as a symbol, loses points for copping Z’s style when it comes to sound.

10. C

Versatile in its usage.

9. N

Need it in a lot of words.

8. L

Need it in a lot of words.

7. S

Need it in a lot of words. *Wheel of Fortune voice* RSTLNE.

6. W

Has a cool nickname for a good thing, the “dub.”

5. A

First letter of the alphabet, can’t get it wrong when reciting.

4. F

First letter of the best curse word, which can also be expressed by just saying the letter.

3. E

The best vowel.

2. T

Has a commonly used phrase used with it (“crossing your Ts”), essential in many words.

1. R

Need it all the time. Can roll it, which gives it flavor.

Could I completely re-order these and be happy with the results? Sure. But this is what we’re going with and I hope it ruins your day!

Leave your rankings in the comments.