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This $1 bat full of beer is the best concessions item in sports history

“Here’s $10, give me 10 bats please.”

Forget the hot dog adorned with a thousand wild items, or the gut-busting order of nachos with three pounds of braised pork belly — the Myrtle Beach Pelicans have come up with the greatest concessions item of all time.

The Myrtle Beach Pelicans are doing $1 Beer Day and they’re putting the beer in these long baseball bat glasses

Posted by Baseballer on Sunday, May 16, 2021

It’s so simple I don’t know why every ballpark in America doesn’t offer the bat glass full of beer. Then you throw a $1 price tag on top and it’s just perfection. Yes, there are considerations here, like the warmth of the beer when you get down to the handle — but these are petty concerns for a GIANT $1 BEER!

If we assume this is modeled after a standard 33 oz baseball bat, account for glass, you’re probably looking at a 26-ish oz beer. That’s not so massive that you can’t enjoy it before it goes crazy warm, and enough that it should keep you occupied for a while.

That said, I see a few problems too. Thousands of potentially drunken fans leaving a stadium with glass bats in their hands is a recipe for disaster. Still, small price to pay for such an amazing item.

Important update: The Dan Patrick Show loved the bat too, and, wanted it to be a part of their life too. Unfortunately, like all great things in life, it was too good to be true.

I am crushed.