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Buy these trading cards instead of Donald Trump’s $99 NFT grift

Merry Griftsmas!

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Major announcement?! Who doesn’t love a major announcement? This week the world was promised huge, earth-shattering news from former President Donald Trump and on Thursday he delivered with ... a shitty set of $99 digital trading cards. MERRY GRIFTSMAS AMERICA!

You better act fast, because you absolutely don’t want to miss out on these bad boys to set as your phone background, adorn a school folder, or print them on fabric to run up the flagpole to replace your American flag.

These are such iconic images as “Trump the cowboy,” “Trump as an astronaut,” “Football Trump,” or “Texas NASCAR Donald Trump.”

For $99 you get a randomly generated and minted Trump NFT trading card. The creators are saying there are only 45,000 being created — but know that if you try and sell these on the secondary market they’ll immediately lose 10% off the top with every single sale, according to the cards’ site.

“On each secondary sale of a Trump Digital Trading Card, there will be a 10% royalty on the sale price that will be paid back to the creator.”

It’s the holiday season and everyone is spending money on each other, but that doesn’t mean you should just flush $99 down the toilet on a pointless NFT in a tanking market that has absolutely no appreciable value. Here are much better uses of $99 in the trading card space that exist right now, and you’re free to do with them as you please.

A sealed box of 1989 Topps baseball cards

Enjoy the nostalgia!

A sealed box of PBR 2005 cards

Who knew there were bullriding cards?! I didn’t. Enjoy these real cowboys at their craft.

This collection of Richard Petty trading cards

Who wouldn’t want to say they’re the owner of a complete collection of Richard Petty trading cards?

A graded Ken Griffey Jr. rookie card

This is legitimately cool to put in an office, on a bookshelf, or wherever.

An autographed Franco Harris card with certificate of authenticity

Any Steelers fan would love this.

A complete set of 1991 Nolan Ryan cards

You get 10 cards for less than one Trump NFT.

A graded 1992-93 Shaquille O’Neal rookie card

Look at that art! Shaq is an Animorph!

A sealed pack of Space Jam stickers

Okay, these aren’t cards, I know — but neither are NFTs. At least you can stick these on your walls.

An Emmitt Smith rookie card

Another actual Cowboy, and this one is graded!

A 1961 Hank Aaron rookie card

Here’s another card that’s at a discount, and would be super cool mounted in a frame in your office or rec room with other memorabilia.