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ACC restaurant coming soon to Raleigh-Durham airport: Let's build its menu

This changes nothing about Bojangles being the most ACC restaurant.

Rendering of the ACC American Cafe
Rendering of the ACC American Cafe

Yes, this is real:

Think upscale dining, not a traditional sports bar. Its menu features a range of farm-to-market dishes along with entrees inspired by the home cities of ACC teams. Tastes include steak, seafood, burgers, N.C. barbecue, wraps, salads, small plates and more. There's even a ceviche dish to enjoy!

In association with ACC expert Martin Rickman, our spin on the ACC American Cafe menu:

me: Ron Cherry Cake (pie makes too much sense)

Martin: Bud Foster Lunchpail Special

me: Jimbokabobs

Martin: Boston College Creme De Menthe Smoothie

me: Sun Bowl of Soup

Martin: Kraft Fight Hunger Platter

me: Swofford Souffle

Martin: Bye Bye Ms. Maryland Pie

me: Wake Forest Demon Bacon

me: 7-5 With Extra Chives

Martin: Wake Forest Demon Bacon Cheddar Fries

me: Raycomdiments

Martin: Mike Gminskielbasa Sandwich

Martin: Chicken Cutcliffe

me: Paul Johnson's Get Bent Surprise (available in Regular and Fuck Frank Beamer sizes)

Martin: Miami Surf 'n Turf: So good it outta be on probation

me: The Weinkewich

Martin: dadgummy worms

me: Chris Rix 'n' Crispix

Martin: Aaron Curry Chicken Salad

me: Reggie Ball Of Food You Can Eat Or Roll Around Or Send Back

Martin: UNC Make Your Own Major Buffet

me: The Glennon Sampler

Martin: *stick out your neck and order the Glennon Sampler

Martin: BLT3

me: The Big East

Martin: The Big Feast!

Martin: you can order from two menus: The Atlantic and The Coastal

me: they are exactly the same

Martin: both menus are equally as disappointing

me: heinz brand ketchup snacks brought to you by the university of pittsburgh, coming soon to an acc cafe nearest you, check your grocer's freezer

Martin: The Syracuse Orange: your server will just bring you an unpeeled, uncut orangewith googly eyes pasted on it

me: I lost five pounds in two weeks on the Virginia Cavaliers diet

Martin: Crab Rangoon -- for a limited time only

me: Shalalalasagne

Martin: Jim Grobe Special. It is just a Waffle with piles of cash on it

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