College football has too many bowl games. Everyone accepts this.
All but the three Playoff games are kind of pointless. Most of them reward mediocrity. They have embarrassing sponsors. Attendance is often hilarious. They're held in a bizarre list of cities, either in craterous NFL stadiums or glorified high school stadiums.
Players like getting to go, you like watching sports on TV, and TV companies like making money off you. So there are too many bowls, and there will continue to be too many. You're going to have to embrace it, or everyone will know you get mad about dumb stuff.
Four new ones joined last year. Four more could join this year. That's two years. That's a trend that will never change, probably. Hooray!
When would we have enough for all 128 current FBS programs to go bowling? In 2021, we'd have 67 bowls, meaning extra spots for an expanded Playoff or what have you.
When would we have 100 bowls? In 2030, we'd have 103 bowls. What a milestone.
When would we have enough bowls for all 128 current FBS programs to host their own cupcake opponents, so everybody gets to enjoy a bowl win? We'd have 131 bowls in 2037, meaning spots for programs that move up from FCS and UAB's return and so forth.
When would we crack 1,000 bowls? That'd take about 240 years, assuming nanobowl technology does not enable self-replicating bowl AI.
When will Northwestern win its third bowl since bowls began in 1902? Nanobowls can only do so much.
When would a bowl system in control of energy on the scale of its own galaxy emerge, with energy consumption at ≈4×1044 erg/sec? Whenever ESPN wants it to happen.
Where will we put all these bowls?
At present, bowl games go in major metropolitan areas in warm climates, along with surprises like Shreveport and New York City. This map includes the four potential new 2015 games.
Obviously, we should fill in more big markets first, even though College Football Law dictates that at least 60 percent of new bowls must go in cities you'd never in your life consider visiting if not for family reasons, while another 10 percent must go in Orlando.
Counting cities with multiple bowls already, here are enough spots to have games in North America's top 15-ish international metros and fill in the rest of the United States' top 70 metros, pretty much.
NOT ENOUGH. Let's add every state capital, countries that like our sports, countries that humor us by pretending to like our sports, and so on.
When will this end?
Every Day Should Be Saturday has the exact answer, based on student populations: when we hit 262,502 bowls.