clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

T.W.I.S., where totally unhinged Texas fans overwhelm everyone else's anger

Welcome to This Week In Schadenfreude, your weekly roundup of the angriest college football fans, from sea to shining s-/BIG TWELVE OFFICIALS SOLD BEVO TO THE RUSSIANS.

As many teams dove into conference play, we saw new levels of pain. Losing a non-conference game is unpleasant, but if you're a Power 5 program, you can recover and maybe snag a Playoff spot. Even if you lose twice outside the conference, you can still tell yourself that what really matters is how you perform against the teams you see every year.

The conference losses just hurt in a way the others can't. Though our first example is a pretty good argument to the contrary.


Virginia Tech fans at The Key Play don't like losing, but they haaaaaaaaate losing to ECU.

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?!?? How the hell did we lose this game? They gave us 14 FUCKING points and we still lost?!? Maybe I've had too much to drink (VERY LIKELY), and the officiating was some of the WORST I've ever seen, but still I had very few worries coming into this game. They couldn't run the ball, and DBU wouldn't allow them to pass..Guess what?!! They did BOTH!! I don't usually post negative stuff,,, but right now dunk and at 11pm I'm done (I'll likely be better tomorrow) I'm wondering why I let my heart get ripped out again and again by a team that will never be more than an afterthought. Yeah, we went to the championship game 16 years ago, but it took two great players to do it. Who here honestly thinks we're anywhere close to being an annual contender?? Not me.

(VERY LIKELY) should be the name of a Frank Beamer-branded wine.

another example of the coaches not getting the players laser focused and the players still living off the Purdue high the week before.

Getting high off beating Purdue is the college football equivalent of drinking mouthwash for the alcohol content.

You know if I pay 10 bucks to see a movie and don't like it I get up and leave. I have been buy ing tickets to a bad movies for 4 years now.

FUCK DAMMIT! STILL lividly raged and pissed off! FUCK DAMMIT!!!

I know it's in poor taste to speak ill of the dead, but I hope the heat gets cranked up in Weaver's cell in hell for getting us into this "rivalry" with ECU.

That would be former VT Athletic Director Jim Weaver, who passed away in JULY. Though, if your fate in the A.D. afterlife is based on scheduling winnable non-conference games while you're alive, Baylor's Ian McCaw might get canonized.

I may get so drunk I eat Wendy's BBQ. Stupid pirates w/ their stupid pirate fingers.

Compiling TWIS leads me to a lot of instances of proclaimed self-harm, but this may be one of the worst. Please seek help, sir or ma'am. Or at least just stick to ordering a Frosty.

Let's move to the in-state rival of the Hok-



From Burnt Orange Nation:

Someone start a petition to the NCAA about these fucking refs!
The refs calling this game need to be reprimanded if not fired. There was clearly an attempt to influence the outcome of the game. Having said that, I can't fucking believe we muff the snap and don't get off a punt to go to OT.

fuck osu and fuck the refs
this game has a stink to it that I cannot ignore. I have never believed in conspiracies but there we so many phantom calls where even the dipshit announcers couldnt hazard a guess. FUCK THE REFS AND FUCK OSU.

I shall now call this emotion PRANGRY. I suspect I'm going to feel it a lot more this season.

I'm livid at how the game was called. The refs were calling it close, and that's fine if applied evenly and fairly, but there were so many ticky tacky things that seemingly ONLY got called on us and not on OSU. I won't even get into the heartbreaking, horrible "holding" or "roughing the passer" flubs. These refs can, how do I put this, get AIDS.

[/slams security door shut, locks deadbolt]

Sheesh. I'm sorry about that. You would think fans of a team that's only beaten Rice wouldn't be so heated about a close loss to a ranked opponent, especially when Texas went 4-of-16 on third down and gave up 7.5 yards per passing attempt. And, you know, couldn't punt the ball at the end of the game. Sure, the Longhorns had some seriously questionable calls, but these things happen. I'm sure that was just a small minority howling CONSPIRACY. We should be safe now.


As I was saying, Virginia Tech fans could take comfort in knowing that their Commonwealth enemies didn't have a great week either, getting stomped at home by Boise State. One commenter at Streaking The Lawn tried to see the positives.

Good news/bad news
Good news: The eyes of the college football world were on UVa tonight.
Bad news: The eyes of the college football world were on UVa tonight.

Another was willing to say what we've all been thinking.

If Mike London was a white guy
he'd have been fired years ago.

I know, right? It's undeniable that there have been more white coaches fired in college football history than black ones. Like, WAY more. Do the math.

Meanwhile, fans at The Sabre continues its crusade to find the next leader for the Hoos and, well, it's starting to get weird and sad.

Mack Brown is our best option

Yes he's 64 and he might only stay 5 years. But he's a winner and can put a good staff together. He can make us respectable and the job is more attractive when he retires.

So you're saying you want to pay Mack Brown to stick around to 69. Gross.

Don't know if anyone has already brought his name up but what about

Derek Dooley? I know his last head coaching stint went down in flames at Tennessee and he had a losing record at LaTech but I always thought he could be a successful head coach given the right situation. He's a former UVA player and current wide receivers coach for the Cowboys. Hopefully he learned from his mistakes at UT (plus the expectations here are totally different). Would certainly be an upgrade from the current coaching debacle, IMHO.

"Listen, I know he's crashed two planes before, but that means he's due for a successful flight!"

Dave Clausen.... would he be interested in leaving Wake Forest?

Seems that everywhere this guy goes he leaves and whomever inherits his program has an instant winner. I bet with the players that Virginia has now he could squeeze out maybe six or seven wins with them.

So when you said "instant winner" and followed it with "six or seven wins," you meant it in the same sense as "instant ramen."


Despite our previous shaming, Terrapin fans at Testudo Times continue to speculate about who should replace Randy Edsall. Some of their ideas are laughable.

Back up the cash truck to Jim Tresel's door - WE'RE NOT EVEN COMPETITIVE ANYMORE EVEN THOUGH WE HAVE TALENT ON THE ROSTER. If we didn't have talent, that would be one thing, but WE DO!!!!! They aren't being given the tools to succeed by this coaching staff!!!!! Tresel has held the trophy over his head, knows how to build a champion, and is itching to get back in college football. Imagine him at the helm of an Under Armour giant building fantastic facilities. Think of the 4 and 5 star prospects who would be itching to play for him!!!!!!!!!!!! If Kevin Anderson has half a brain (questionable), he'll be on the phone with Tresel tonight!!!!!!!!

Ok, they're all laughable. Some of them are economical, though!

Randy Edsall!!
Leave now

I'll take a chipmunk as my next coach

It'll be interesting to see how far down the animal kingdom Maryland fans are willing to go on this j-



From Barking Carnival:

Cheaters, period.
Never seen a conference rig a game and gift a win to an inferior team like the Big 12 just did for Oklahoma State. 14 points erased with questoinable penalties, and a free field goal to tie the game at a time when OSU's offense could do nothing.

Can we stop pretending conferences don't instruct refs to protect their unbeatens in college football? The SEC did it for years and now the Big 12 is doing it after last year's playoff snub. Ridiculous. Oklahoma State fans, you'll be back on the bus to the basement where you belong next year. Enjoy your free win.

Fuck the Big 12
Fuck OSU. Fuck OU. Fuck TCU. Fuck Tech. Fuck kansas and kansas state. Fuck Iowa State..Fuck A&M just because. Fuck ESPN. . Fuck Baylor and most of all fuck this quack officiating crew..we should throw our huge scrotum on the table and go independent.

I agree, I've already sent my email to the big 12 and made a comment on their facebook page for all to see.
This is the end game on Gambling college football, a rigged game.. They clean this up or die a slow death on the vine. I've never seen anything like it, the kicker for me was the holding play on a defensive lineman on a running play, away from the ball no less. I played, never even knew a call like that could be made. It really can't. More than one on that crew needs fired.


Charlie Strong
Is responsible for this loss. Yes, the refs were terrible, and should be investigated by the Big XII.

However, letting his emotions get the best of him cost his team 15 very important yards after a terrible call, and beyond poor clock management at the end of the game allowed OSU to kick a FG to win.

This loss is on Charlie Strong.

This is my favorite. You're willing to imagine that the referees were engaged in a concerted effort to make Texas lose ... but the loss is still on Charlie Strong. It's like blaming the building for being "too soft" instead of the arsonists. Let me shut that window these Longhorns crawled in through. Hopefully they'll just go away on their own.


A close loss to Michigan State on the road was one thing. It didn't erase hope, or send the Oregon faithful into a screaming fit of existential panic. Buuuut then the Ducks lost at home to Utah by 42 points. Take it away, Addicted To Quack.

Drank 1/2 a bottle of Woodford
Smoked myself a bit hazy and watched that clusterfuck. Woke up with the whiskeyshits and some clarity of mind. Here's what I figured out: We really suck. We almost comically suck. Like it's actually a little entertaining to watch us play defense. You just never know what you're going to see.

I think this is going to be a silly, silly year.

The Whiskeyshits and Some Clarity of Mind, A Novel by Bret Easton Ellis

Helfrich : Oregon :: Coker : Miami, only without the NC ring

[/spits water] DAMN.

I have a different name to compare to Helfrich
His name is Gene Chizik.

[/spits more water] DAMMMMMMMMN.

Well that frees up my weekends
Willing to watch losses but not willing to witness assaults. Fire them all. Start fresh.


Don't think of it as the worst loss in home history. Think of it as an enhanced teambuilding technique!


Speaking of torture, one commenter at Rocky Top Talk points out that Tennessee's literally been hoisted by its own petard.

Something that made me laugh in a very gallows humor kind of way
Tennessee had to burn two timeouts to prevent time runoffs due to penalties in the final minute, a rule that exists because Tennessee got screwed out of a win when a team used a penalty as a timeout.

So the cruel and bizarre ways that Tennessee has found to lose over the years have now come full circle. The torture is now begetting itself.

The premium bile, however is over at VolNation.

Who are the Vols mean players? The ones who will intentionally injure you rather than get beat by you. willing to do anything to knock an opponent out of the game and possibly the season or more.. Who are the Vols who get pizzed off and violently act out. Spare me the sportsmanship crap, every team has them, who are ours?

He has a point. If Tennessee starts committing dumb personal fouls when defending third and long, fourth down conversions won't be a thing!

This is the analogy of the loss:
3 days before Christmas. You ask your parents for a video console. You guys go to Best Buy and notice your parents actually bought it! But you don't want to say much.

2 days before, you actually found the package! Boom! But you keep it hush hush.

1 day, you feel a bit gutsy and you open the package. Plug it in and sneak a game in! Then quickly put the console back in package.

So now it's Christmas morning. You see all your presents. The package is all wrapped up! You are gonna save this one for last! You open the other presents , but were like apples, and clothes. Nothing exciting at all. Now it's the grand finale! You open the wrapper! The package is right there! It shows the video console on the package! It's here! You shake it! It's in the box!

So you immediately open the package........................................... .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. realize it's a bunch of bricks. brick by brick.

Best Christmas prank of all time.


Get one roundup of college football stories, rumors, game breakdowns, and Jim Harbaugh oddity in your inbox every morning.


As a source of angry, poorly considered comments, I hate Rock M Nation. They're far too collected when the Tigers stumble. You just lost to Kentucky! Start screaming about how Gary Pinkel's never been good and all the football money would be better spent on soy ice cream sandwiches because they're less disappointing! Seriously, how is this the best you have to offer?

There are so many problems that it's hard to finger point when we lose.
Playcalling? Bad.

Passing? Bad.

Rushing? Bad.

Receiving? Bad.

Blocking? Bad.

Decision making? Poor.

I hate these non-traditional grading schemes. Is poor better than bad? Sigh. Let's go se-



More Barking Carnival:

Joey FUCKING Crawford
The ONLY NBA ref I know by name, what an asshat.

Thanks for writing this Scip. I wanted to write something but all I could do was cuss, scare my dog, wake up the baby, and drink alcohol while clenching my teeth and trying to not break my new laptop.

To put it succinctly, FUCK OSU, FUCK THE REFS, FUCK THE BIG 12.

I'm just impressed you were able to drink while clenching your teeth.

The scary thing to me is that the source of the fix might have been UT people. If, as Scip posits, the motivation was racism (a la Remember the Titans) that probably means somebody wants Texas to lose so Charlie gets fired quicker. Who would have that interest and the means to accomplish it? Um, mostly big UT donors, like Red McCombs who mouthed off when Charlie was hired and then made sure the guy who hired Charlie and Shaka Smart left after less than 2 years.

It's not truly a conspiracy until you start thinking the whole thing was an inside job. What if Strong paid the refs to screw Texas so that he could pin it on the boosters and then they'd be unable to push for his firing? THIS SHIT HAS SO MANY LAYERS, MAN.

I have a solution of sorts..
though it's highly unlikely that anything this simple and dramatic will ever happen.

Suspend every official working the game indefinitely,....until one of them comes forward and explains what happened. And that one person would receive immunity from prosecution. Suspensions would continue forever if no one spoke up. After a few weeks or few years of no income from officiating, someone would, as they say, spill the beans.

What you're describing is the plot of Marathon Man.

We could call these refs every imaginable thing ......
...and it still would fall short of actuality.
I have never seen anything like this game.
The calls.
The number of calls.
The number of bad calls.
The time it took to make a call...any call.
The aggressive ref who went after Charlie, and then gave Charlie the technical foul.
They ruined the or lose....they simply ruined the game.

At least we got our Inadvertent Commenter Poetry in for the week. I'm activating emergency perimeter defenses to keep the Texas fans out. (It's just a projector that shows the BYU-Texas game from 2013 on a loop.)


It's only one loss, and it came to a UCLA that might be really good, so that might explain the relative absence of bile at Wildcat Sports Report. Not a total absence, mind you.

F%ck Arizona Football for always never changing
It's never going to change. We're a half assed basketball school who can't get beyond the elite 8.

Arizona Football hasn't, and will never win a meaningful game that serves as a launch point to a higher level.

Harsh words when you consider Arizona played in the conference title game last year, but I can underst-



oh my god they're everywhere get to the panic room

The real tragedy for me is that American sports has been a refuge for me from the corruption in almost every other venue. This type of stuff used to be considered a scandal in college sports and its infrequency gave me a therapeutic sense of the truth and spontaneity for what I was watching. But alas, college sports has become a major market center and is following pedophile priests and VW into the abyss.


Quit whining and ACT!
There was a clear injustice done not just to Texas but to all of college football....this type of corruption cannot be tolerated or exonerated. All of us remember the NBA officials fixing games and the NCAA basketball fixing scheme in the 70s and 80s....this has NOTHING to do with sour grapes....I've been a football fan for 40 years and cannot comprehend what I witnessed yesterday. Let our voices be heard to our AD first, then the Big XII, then the NCAA, and if nothing is accomplished then lets demand a criminal investigation by local and federal authorities. These corrupt officials have to be held accountable for the good of the game!!

holy shit you know texas fans are pissed if they want the FEDERAL GOVERNMENT WHICH THEY HATE ALMOST AS MUCH AS TEXAS A&M to do something shit go go go go go keep running don't look back

I'm sorry, but while Charlie Strong is ready to coach in the Big 12, it's far from clear that the Big 12 and especially its referees are ready for Charlie Strong to be in the Big 12. Thus has it ever been. Ron Prince was basically run out of the league by a series of horrendously called games, far before his contract was up at K State. Other than that, what history do we have that says the Big 12 is ready for someone like Strong? Ruffin McNeil's brief tenure at Texas Tech before being run off?

but ron prince's terrible coaching transcended race they're gaining on us hurry close the door NOW


[/heavy breathing]

That's 17 inches of steel. I don't know how we're going to get out of here, but there's no way they can get to us inside this bunker. We should be able to last for a while on this Auburn anger from SEC Rant I stashed in here after they lost to Mississippi State.

Fire Gus.
Said it last week. Nobody joined me. Being a head coach requires more than being a good "read option offensive coordinator"

I'm over it. I was last season when our offense started sputtering.

Bring in a real HC and OC.

This is why you never want an Auburn graduate as your physician. They'll pull the plug the minute your temperature gets above 100.

This POS staff should man up and take their millions of free money and step aside. The most pathetic POS motherfrickers I've ever seen. frick GUS AND HIS WHOLE FAMILY

But Auburn's whole thing is that everyone's family. You're telling us you hate yourself! (Wait, that's extremely Southern. Nothing to see here.)
It's time.. 2 garbage products back 2 back years... 0 player development. You get consecutive top 10 classes but put that shite on the field.... it's time to go in a different direction. Understand what he did in 13.. but what have u done for me lately. 2 hyped teams.. nothing to show. Move on from this guy

The best part about this comment is that the author didn't even bother to register the website. It's like nine bucks to buy a domain, buddy. Commit to the bit.

I will say, as an Auburn fan, I'm glad that when we suck we go all in on it. It makes it a lot easier to handle as a fan.

Still, this is nothing compared to the despair Arkansas fans are exper-



Oh no.

It's ShaggyTexas.

Is this thread someone posts the identity of these $#@!suckers so we can send them hate mail? Seriously, this has been god $#@!ing awful officiating. One of the worst I can remember as far as EVERY call going against us and so many huge plays. Hopefully it evens out, if it doesn't, this crew went to to Tim Donaghy school of officiating.

I hope Isis targets their ass. I'll support a Jihad on these $#@!suckers any day.

Texas should go independent, $#@! the big12 and the refs

All the money Texas brings to the conference, $#@! the rest of the conference.

Steve Patterson just got a big check. Wouldn't surprise me at all if that vindictive $#@! spent some of it on zebra appreciation this week.

$#@! you Deloss Dodds
For locking up THE UNIVERSITY OF TEXAS into this roadkill, flyover state, dog$#@! joke of a conference. Your navigation of conference realignment in 2010 and beyond was like watching tubgirl on an endless loop.

$#@! off Okie Bitches and your Refs
seriously go $#@! yourselves. in the ass. with a rusty tailpipe.

I've seen $#@!ty refs a lot and bitched and lived with it but this is something different. I don't want to let this go. If anyone has emails for Bowlsby, Big 12 refs supervisor, a $#@!ing hitman or someone willing to go nancy Kerrigan on that POS, anything, post it here.

I've already said my prayers that these $#@!stick $#@!gobbling $#@! stains all survive head-on collisions on their way home tonight and spend the rest of their miserable $#@!ing lives drooling and $#@!ting on themselves while some do gooder spoons mushed peas into their mouths

I love you all, and I'm sorry this is how it ends for us.