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'Please refrain from shooting lasers onto the field,' said a stern football referee to fans

Knock it off, you laser freaks.

During the second quarter of Friday night's Baylor-Rice game, someone was shining a green laser pointer onto the field. That part is not interesting. Disregard that information. It does not compare to the following video, of referee Daniel Gautreaux powerfully imploring the Houston crowd to cease its lasering immediately:

"Ladies and gentlemen, please refrain from shooting lasers onto the field. Thank you."

What command and authority. I agree to your demands and will pocket all light-based weaponry.

Florida State head coach Jimbo Fisher, long a proponent of more lasers in football, is surely aghast.