Former LSU head coach Les Miles’ first head coaching job in nearly two full years will be at Kansas, a program that has struggled mightily for about a decade now. While it’s a bit of an awkward fit for Miles, and there’s no guarantee as to how it’ll go, having him back in college football is a lot of fun for so many reasons.
1. Miles’ holiday rants are officially back, folks.
Columbus Day? Hell yeah, you’re gonna learn about Columbus Day:
I am the easiest man to please when it comes to food. I have to be honest, I think it’s definitely the turkey with a warm gravy. Maybe it’s the last spoon or fork on the plate, you know, that has a little bit of salt and pepper, and maybe a little bit of turkey and gravy and some of the stuffing that would be there, and maybe just a smidgeon of that cranberry stuff. Not like a big, not kind of the overwhelm the last bite, but that right there, oh my goodness, that last bite’s worth a lot, right? I might add that the the turkey sandwich with mayonnaise, mustard, onions and a turkey salad, and a little lettuce, kind of makes for good eating later too, doesn’t it? Wish you hadn’t mentioned that. I haven’t had my lunch yet.
St. Patty’s Day:
And on and on.
2. Emotional postgame pressers are, too, folks.
One of his more famous “JUST SO YA KNOW” moments came after LSU beat Ole Miss 41-35 in 2012. (Warning: Some NSFW language here)
And after Florida beat LSU that same year, someone made a “hammer and nail” analogy to compare the two teams. When LSU beat Florida in 2013, he was asked again about that analogy. Let’s just say he didn’t like that:
I got a question for you. It was a 14-6 game. We played our ass off. And how anybody could pick a hammer and the nail, when in fact that hammer or that nail or whatever in the hell you’ve got picked ...
We catch a ball down there, we take the lead, we turn it over, I mean, explain to me how Kevin Minter, who sets damn near the career tackle record in that game, how anybody could ever say hammer and the nail?
Here’s what happens. Two very quality teams take the field and compete like a son of a bitch for victory. You know what? It’s not a hammer and a nail relationship. It’s an opportunity for an opponent to be equal, and to raise their level of play in such a fashion that they win. And that’s how this thing works, that in fact you respect the opponent, and he’s not the hammer, and he’s not the frickin’ nail, okay? He’s the opponent. You understand?
I’m just letting you know, I resent that. I resent the fact that suddenly, we were nailed. You got it? I mean honest to Pete’s. Shit, we’re a pretty good team last year. I thought we played like a son of a bitch in that statement. I felt differently than the nail, so you know.
3. He’s already a great fit for a basketball-first school. See the evidence!
4. He’s already got a Big 12 cowboy hat!
Look at how ready this former Oklahoma State head coach was already for recruiting in Texas, y’all:
5. Listen to the way he pronounced the word “Arkansas.”
It’s like he was telling us all along about his secret dream job.
5. We get to see the Mad Hatter’s gamblin’ again!
During his time at LSU, he was well-known for going for fake field goals and punts — a lot of them coming against one of LSU’s biggest rivals, Florida:
- One of the most notable was in 2010 against Florida:
The Tigers won 33-29.
- Against the Gators in 2014, this fake punt was unfortunately called back for a penalty:
- Again against Florida in 2015! (The Gators should’ve known this was coming, tbh.)
- Against South Carolina in 2007:
6. He’s now among college football’s most experienced actors.
During his time away from coaching, he appeared in a few smaller films, such as Camera Obscura, which was filmed in Baton Rouge:
And, in addition to roles in some commercials, he played a character named Billy in The Last Whistle:
8. He’ll really have to go on journeys in order to find his beloved grass during home games.
While he was at LSU, he became famous for eating grass on the field of wherever his team was playing:
Russell Shepard: “I see him do it every day. That’s Coach Miles. He eats that grass. I guess he says it has a lot of protein.”— Andy Staples (@Andy_Staples) November 7, 2010
Unfortunately the Jayhawks play on turf, but there are loads of fields in Kansas that he can eat plenty of grass on. Look at this greenery he can roam through every Saturday!
Great to have you back, Les. Let’s see how this Kansas experiment goes!