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Cat people finally get their Puppy Bowl

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Hallmark believes in kittens, and they're going all in to prove it.

Every year Animal Planet tries to up the cuteness on Super Bowl Sunday with their Puppy Bowl, an incomprehensible mix of cuteness and assumed football. Now Hallmark is upping the stakes with the Kitten Bowl in an attempt to drink Animal Planet's milkshake and eat their cheezburger.

Now let's break down some of the competitors.

Troy Paw-Lamalau

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Strong pun work Kitten Bowl. We're picking up what you're putting down. Paw-Lamalau looks light on his feet, but putting him at "running cat" is a missed opportunity for "fur-ee safety."

Tim Teepaw

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Even Hallmark know their Tebow kitty can't play quarterback. Nevertheless, look at this cat. What an upstanding young role model for the kids. No tattoos or anything.

Dandy Dalton

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THEY FOUND A GINGER CAT AND HE'S SO CUTE AND LOOK AT THAT COLLAR IT'S LIKE FOUR SIZES TOO BIG.

Catvin Johnson

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Receiver, dependable, loves Catalina Island. Man, at least try Hallmark -- you just copied over a profile of Calvin Johnson.

TONGUE.

Terry Bradclaw

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Yep.

Hairy Rice

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Watch out! Vampire kitteh!

Fun fact: Jerry Rice drinks human blood almost exclusively. Kind of surprising Hallmark would break that news this way.

Manti Meow

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Manti has no personality.