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THEORY: Age and ability to watch late-night basketball are directly correlated

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Babies are awful at watching late-night basketball.

Last night, I was watching BYU-San Diego State in the first round of the Maui Invitational, a double-overtime thriller that featured two tourney teams with a history of distaste going toe to toe, a battle that went late into the night. And while watching it, I saw something disturbing:

Two babies, peacefully sleeping during an incredible basketball game.

Come on, babies! What is wrong with you? Sure, this game was the last of the day, starting at 11:30 p.m. Eastern time, and extending later than it was supposed to because of two wonderful overtimes. But still! Think about how much these babies spent to fly to Hawai'i, only to fall asleep during the pivotal moment of their game! And to think those babies call themselves BYU fans.

But this reminded me of something I saw last year:

Yes, the Wichita State Grannies, who chugged energy drink to stay up for their team's late-night tip during the Tip-Off Marathon.

This leads me to one theory:

Where X = age and Y = ability/desire to stay up all night watching basketball, X and Y are directly correlated
It has yet to be disproven. I look forward to a long life and eventually being able to spend 24 hours a day, 365 days a year mainlining college hoops with no breaks.