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'Casino's Law' is the most insane (local) Super Bowl ad ever

There was a halftime Super Bowl ad you probably didn't see. You should fix that right now.

what

wait, how

what

Okay, okay. Let's start at the top:

what

*splashes cold water on face*

Come on, focus. I can do this. Okay. So: this is a commercial created by eThree Media for Jamie Casino's Savannah-area law firm, improbably run by a painted-beard enthusiast named Jamie Casino who was somehow not created by Michael Scott. From the YouTube description:

An epic 2 Minute Halftime Commercial written and directed by Jamie Casino. The spot features Jamie's brother Michael who was gunned down with his friend on Labor Day 2012. The story reveals how Savannah's Chief of Police, Willie Lovett, deceived the citizens of Savannah after four homicides took place Labor Day weekend. Jamie Casino, a personal injury attorney with a large practice based in Savannah, GA created the ad to set the record straight in the Biggest Game of the Year, Super Bowl XLVIII.

That description makes slightly more sense than the actual commercial, which features Jamie and his ubiquitous sledgehammer (which is apparently a thing) smashing -- his brother's headstone? As a means of symbolizing his fight on crime? The entire thing has the overall effect of a trailer for a Brian Bosworth action/revenge film. This two-minute ad features:

- A bible verse that appears to endorse vigilantism
- Voiceover describing legal defendants as "cold-hearted villains"
- A recreation of a lawyer receiving tragic news
- A portrayal of the subject of the advertisement as a Machiavellian scumbag-for-hire
- A child's innocence
- HARD ROCK RIFFS
- 'Posterize' filter in Photoshop
- Soul-searching while looking into a mirror
- Dry ice
- STEPPIN' ON A ROSE IN A GRAVEYARD (in the rain)
- Soul-searching in a cathedral
- A sledgehammer engraved with the name of a deceased loved one
- FIRE
- Soul-searching while watching your children sleep
- ANTI-HERO BEARD
- LEATHER JACKET
- SUNGLASSES AT NIGHT
- SMASHING THE SYSTEM
- this is a commercial for a lawyer

This ad RAN DURING THE SUPER BOWL in the Savannah area. The real Super Bowl. Georgia residents SAW THIS AD ON THEIR TELEVISIONS.

On this day, most of us regret not being Georgians.

(h/t to Joe McAtee)