EDSBS contributor ActionCookbook may know next to nothing about soccer, but his beyond cute corgi, Holly, has it all figured out.
If you're still not sure about who to pick in these next few weeks' group play action, she's got you covered:
Group A
GROUP A: Brazil (home team) Croatia (dynamic passers) Mexico (DOS A CERO) Cameroon (*shrug*) pic.twitter.com/zleed9wsfe
— Scott (@actioncookbook) June 12, 2014
Holly's on board with the two participants in our opener, Brazil and Croatia.
Group B
GROUP B: Spain (tha gawd) Netherlands (flowers?) Chile (young team I think) Australia ("down under") pic.twitter.com/ypt1UDrx9f
— Scott (@actioncookbook) June 12, 2014
Defending world champs Spain and the always venerable Netherlands are as solid of picks as any.
Group C
GROUP C: Colombia (fun offense) Greece (dunno probably sad) Cote d' Ivoire (this is hard) Japan (loves cute stuff) pic.twitter.com/8k7GKoUhC6
— Scott (@actioncookbook) June 12, 2014
Even Holly knows how boring it is to watch Greece operate with surgical precision.
Group D
GROUP D: Uruguay (great meat there) Costa Rica (I don't care) England (derp) Italy (flop) pic.twitter.com/SEONMbXWkQ
— Scott (@actioncookbook) June 12, 2014
Upsets galore! Our resident soccer guru's evidently no fan of Europe.
Group E
GROUP E: Switzerland (I'm neutral) Ecuador (man it's a hot one) France (had key injuries) Honduras (gonna lose) pic.twitter.com/m4UmQJJlr7
— Scott (@actioncookbook) June 12, 2014
France may be a trendy pick for some, but not for corgis.
Group F
GROUP F: Argentina (Maradona) Bosnia/Herzegovina (twins!) Iran (don't like us) Nigeria (also gonna lose) pic.twitter.com/yf0Z58KQ3W
— Scott (@actioncookbook) June 12, 2014
Bosnia and Herzegovina is our favorite so far.
Group G
GROUP G: Germany (powerful) Portugal (big neighbor overshadows) USA (ON THE RISE) Ghana (screw you. you get a cat.) pic.twitter.com/j3nrRgrAA6
— Scott (@actioncookbook) June 12, 2014
Say it ain't so, Holly!
Group H
GROUP H: I'm tired of researching, so these don't make sense Belgium! Algeria! Russia! South Korea! Go #USMNT y'all pic.twitter.com/i54eUkGYpC
— Scott (@actioncookbook) June 12, 2014
These picks don't make any sense, you say? Well they were picked by a dog, who is adorable. So there.
#FF @actioncookbook (and Holly) if you know what's good for you.