Meet Spencer Dinwiddie, the 38th pick in the 2014 NBA Draft to the Detroit Pistons. He's a 6'6 point guard who probably would've gone much higher if not for a season-ending ACL. He is also a lovable scumbag.
Exhibit A) He likes making 69 jokes, even in official capacities
He knows he's not good enough to be 69. He just wants it to be 69 because, well, niiiiiice. In his defense, Cory Jefferson also said "68-70," which averages out to you know what.
Exhibit B) This pornstache
As the owner of a mustache, I don't believe in stigmatizing mustaches. I think each mustache should be weighed on its personal merits. And this mustache, sirs and madams, is a pornstache. Maybe not this pornstache, but a pornstache nonetheless.