Have you noticed one key thing about Floyd Mayweather's appearance?
Yes, Floyd is hairless -- or as some say, "bald." Keeping a hair-free look is a bold choice that he pulls off very well. Some people lack the properly shaped head to be bald with confidence, but the boxer is able to. The great thing about being bald is that it's super cheap to maintain and easy, too. Unless you're Floyd Mayweather.
You see, Floyd spends more money on a haircut than you do on a year's worth or haircuts. Heck, if you go to a Great Clips or Great Clips equivalent, then it's more than five years' worth of haircuts. A cool $1,000 just to have his head shaved.
That might sound like a lot (it is), but how often do you think Floyd gets this done? Once a month? Every two weeks? How about TWICE a WEEK -- sometimes up to THREE times in a week. Mayweather enjoys spending money -- or wasting it.
Look, far be it from me to tell a rich person how to spend their money, but I'm going to tell a rich person how to spend their money. Spending $1,000 on a head shave is absolutely ridiculous and only appropriate in these exclusive circumstances:
- The stylist uses a platinum and diamond encrusted razor.
- You get to eat five whole lobsters while getting your head shaved.
- The $1,000 includes hush money to keep your stylist from revealing your secret that you are a real-life werewolf.
- Jazz hands.
- Your head is rubbed with ambergris before AND after the shave.
- The Rock is your barber and he shaves your head with the back of his razor-sharp hand.
- A small, but talented improv group that is ready to break it big but just hasn't found the right opportunity because their agent Gary can't get them into the big clubs, performs for you live each haircut.
- All you can eat caviar sundae bar. What's a caviar sundae? It's that thing where you fill a crystal glass with caviar and blinis and top it with gold flakes.
- Your leftover stubble dust is infused in a bottle of artisanal vodka.
- You get shaved ... everywhere.