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Grading each round of the Mariners vs. Athletics Twitter beef

The Mariners are creating a new holiday for fans called “Felix Day,” which will honor every fifth day of the year in appreciation of how often star pitcher Felix Hernandez takes the mound. On Wednesday, the team posted a video honoring the event, and the Athletics didn’t appreciate the video closing in on one of their players being struck out:

Round 1

Winner: A’s

Oakland’s burn works on two levels: Firstly, making fun of the Mariners’ lack of success is a solid opening; secondly, they reference a part of the video where a man proposes to his girlfriend on Felix Day. Not exactly a sick burn, but it’s worlds better than just tweeting a GIF of the video YOU made.

Round 2

Winner: Mariners

The A’s doing the whole “kiss the ring” thing is a solid power move, but there is no way you’re going to beat an intentional Smash Mouth. The intentional Smash Mouth is a sports Twitter tactic by which you conflate a team with its most embarrassing fan.

Smash Mouth loves the A’s, and last year the band got into a fight with the team after criticizing the team’s lack of moves. By bringing them into a fight, the Mariners not only tied the two together, but they referenced that prior beef:

Round 3

Winner: A’s

The Athletics maintain a theme to their tweets. They keep going back to the source material, which is a solid tactic. The “L” balloon is a reference to the Mariners’ original video which started all this, and needed a solid comeback.

Instead, Seattle decided to throw in the towel and let Oakland have the round.


**GASP** Despite clearly losing two out of the three rounds, Seattle had the best zing of the day with the Smash Mouth quip. And when it’s all said and done, the Mariners ended a baseball Twitter argument happening in the middle of a Wednesday in March.

That makes them the real winners.