Monday night was a big one for Tom Brady, who appeared on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert to talk a little football, eat a strawberry for the first time, and chug a beer.
TONIGHT: Tom Brady doesn't usually drink beer, but when he does... pic.twitter.com/xGWdnlhJOR— The Late Show (@colbertlateshow) March 13, 2018
Downing a beer in one-gulp runs so counter to the Brady ethos that naturally Patriots fans lost it on Twitter. I’ll spare you the “that’s my quarterback” GIFs and “GOAT OF BEER DRINKING!” tweets, but they’re there — I promise.
Now, for most quarterbacks this would be a fun offseason moment that barely moved the needle, but because it’s Brady there are now hundreds of critiques of his form and yes — even some conspiracy theories.
The switched glass theory.
Steve Brabrand of ESPN noticed something about the beer chug video that most missed: Colbert switched the glasses shortly before the chug.
He’s not wrong. The glasses were definitely switched just before the chug, with neither Brady nor Colbert drawing much attention to it. Was only one of these glasses beer? It’s possible — and it makes sense for either party to not want to down a beer during the show.
Perhaps Brady didn’t want to drink.
Maybe Colbert had a full show to do and didn’t want a beer.
Nonetheless, we have a conspiracy on our hands that was later countered by ...
ACTUALLY BRADY IS A WORLD CHAMPION BEER CHUGGER DINGUS!
The would certainly explain why Brady is so adept at chugging. He has a chug history. Honestly, I got sidetracked on this whole “Did Tom drink beer?” thing because of this tweet.
I know a guy that worked at that Dinosaurs. Later that night one of the Pats starters...cant remember who...forced Edelman to eat snow they pissed in. I think it was Welker. I can't remember tho...they were all trashed lol— JRoback (@J_RobackJr) March 13, 2018
The Patriots are kinda wild ...
Anyway, there’s a lot more than meets the eye to this beer chugging stuff. You probably missed this moment:
Brady and Colbert were actually on Mars.
And Brady was eating a Mars bar, not drinking beer.
And it wasn’t even Brady.
The point is: We’re so caught up trying to find an angle and prove something is a grand conspiracy these days that we miss the whole point. Brady didn’t chug a beer on The Late Show not because of some weird glass switching scheme — but because it was actually Bruno Mars eating a Mars bar on Mars.
Wake up, sheeple.