In 2017 Ayesha Curry and chef Michael Mina announced they would be opening “International Smoke,” a grill restaurant in Houston. In the wake of the NBA Finals, petty Rockets fans are trying to sabotage it before it opens.
Fans are obviously still salty after losing to Steph Curry and the Warriors, so they’re going after Ayesha’s business venture in retaliation. International Smoke is set to open in July, but already has 174 reviews on Yelp, holding at an abysmal 2.5 star rating.
The reviews have become a dumping ground for NBA conspiracy theory, general anger, and people writing coded messages disguised as food reviews. Here’s an amuse-bouche of what you can expect from perusing the comments.
“first and foremost, i would like to start off by saying...how dare you bring this mess to houston. we are good, we do not need this negativity..I can already taste the blandness of the food. This establishment might serve us dusty water and moldy lemons. Ayesha, just pack up your restaurant and be going. You are not welcome in H town. Please save us the trouble and just DONT like Bryson tiller said.... with that being said, The Warriors suck. GO ROCKETS”
“I’ve lost all respect sorry this is absolutely rigged for money... Or ratings in not sure which. I won’t be silent. Just saw it live sry.”
“I ordered the Lobster and it was pretty good. It came with mashed potatoes and French fries and those were both pretty good complements to the lobster. However, this meal still lost to my 4 time most valuable meal, the steak. This is nothing to scoff at, as the steak has been the best meal over the past 12 years. However, after suffering this defeat the lobster, mashed potatoes, and French fries called their friend The Brisket to come join their meal. While this did make the meal way better, I just can’t respect a meal that can’t stand on its own and has to recruit from the other best meals around the kitchen. I’d even go out on a limb to say this meal was rigged.
The bitterness of Rockets fans has also led to a contingency of Warriors fans moving to Yelp to defend International Smoke.
“LOL Rockets fans salty as f***. How about you not miss a record amount of 3 point shots, in the second half, in game 7, at home. If they named the restaurant international chokers would rockets fans give it a good review? It’s a damn restaurant for food if you don’t want to eat there then don’t go.”
“I reaaaly love this restaurant because the people behind it really did their research on what Houston is all about. The food definitely caters to the flavors Houston-ians(?) really enjoy in their mouth : Salty, Sour, and most of all... Bitter.
So come by and indulge.
I recommend getting their super special Salt Water to keep your saltiness hydrated.”
International Smoke is billed as a celebration of barbecued foods from around the world, and it sounds pretty dang good. Just don’t look for reliable reviews on Yelp, because it’s a trash fire.