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The Orioles banned postgame pies in the face

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Monday's Say Hey, Baseball includes a pie ban, John Axford's Oscars picks, and a college baseball bat flip.

Photo by Rob Carr/Getty Images

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The terrible offseason news just keeps on coming for the Orioles. The O's, who used to celebrate victories with a pie in the face delivered by star center fielder Adam Jones, will no longer be able to do so, as Baltimore has made pies to the face illegal. Just to be clear, the city didn't ban pies to the face, just the Orioles -- so please, teams visiting Orioles Park at Camden? Hit your players with pies in the face after victories. You know, in memoriam.

Jones, fittingly, is the one who shared the news with a series of tweets this weekend. It's apparently a safety concern of the Orioles, which we probably shouldn't be surprised about given how particular they are about their players' physicals. Pies, though? Hoverboards? Okay. Solowheels? Makes sense. But pies? This is one safety concern too many, O's.

Did you know the Orioles used actual pies and not just shaving cream in a pie tin for their postgame celebrations? The irony is that the shaving cream pies were far more of a safety concern, given players complained that those were burning their eyes, so a local company, Dangerously Delicious, began providing two real pies per home game. Maybe this is all just a misunderstanding about the word "dangerously" in their name, but to add insult to fear of injury, now the Orioles won't be able to eat the extra pie sent their way.

No wonder Dexter Fowler went back to the Cubs.