The Diamondbacks did a team theme for their off day trip to New York on Thursday, with everyone dressed as various Saturday Night Live characters as a nod to the city they were traveling to. Most of the team did a great job, but there were some lesser showings from the bunch for sure.
Here, a ranking of the team’s costumes.
10. Torey Lovullo - Blues Brother(s?)
Based on some doubled-up characters on the trip, there were definitely enough people for someone to pair up with Lovullo for accuracy. Points for a sharp costume, but the standing alone really takes me out of it.
9. Daniel Descalso and Mark Reed — Garth and Wayne
An easy option, but they executed it well. Chances Descalso already owned those light-wash ripped jeans? Also at first glance I thought Mark Reed was accidentally flipping the camera off in this picture which was a nice bonus.
8. Ketel Marte and Mike Butcher — Spartan Cheerleaders
Again, well-executed but easy. These two were definitely the most comfortable people on the trip. Which, strategically, they should get extra-credit for. “Oh, the rest of the team went with complicated or uncomfortable costumes? Not us.”
7. Jarrod Dyson — The Ladies Man
This is a good getup, but Leon Phelps is an SNL character that needs the impression to go along with it if someone’s wearing the getup. This is nitpicky, yes, but the whole team did so well these rankings are tricky!
6. Yoshihisa Hirano — Samurai Futaba
Well it’s not at all hard, but at least the Diamondbacks did far better avoiding cultural appropriation here than SNL was ever able to. 1975 was ... not a great time for a lot of things. Hirano looks amazing though, and was one of the more involved costumes of the day.
5. Jeff Mathis and David Peralta — Father(s) Guido Sarducci
Yes. Just, yes.
4. Christian Walker and Jimmy Sherfy — Killer Bees
So, so much extra credit for choosing an outfit that requires them to be attached for even a small amount of time.
3. T.J. McFarland and Zack Godley — Bill Swerski’s Super Fans
How can you look at these guys and not immediately smile? They look as happy to be in this giddy-up as a Bears fan is to eat bottomless Polish sausage and ribs.
2. Patrick Corbin, Paul Goldschmidt, Chris Owings and Nick Ahmed — Blue Oyster Cult
I believe by dressing up as this sketch, this quartet is now contractually obligated to perform it for the locker room and film it for fans. I don’t make the rules, guys, I just enforce them.
1. John Ryan Murphy and Archie Bradley — Dick In A Box
JOHN. RYAN. MURPHY. AND. ARCHIE. BRADLEY. OMG.
There was never a way that this wasn’t going to be on top. Especially because even being allowed to dress as this sketch on a team trip seems like it took leaving out some of the specifics and hoping management had either never heard of it or wouldn’t be mad. Or the Diamondbacks are just super chill. Which still makes this awesome.