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Joey Crawford Explains The New Criteria For NBA Technical Fouls

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The NBA announced today that the referees will be working the 2010-2011 season with a broadened definition of what constitutes a technical foul. The exact wording, courtesy of Henry Abbot at ESPN:

• Players making aggressive gestures, such as air punches, anywhere on the court.

• Demonstrative disagreement, such as when a player incredulously raises his hands, or smacks his own arm to demonstrate how he was fouled.

• Running directly at an official to complain about a call.

• Excessive inquiries about a call, even in a civilized tone.

And really, this can end one of three ways.

  1. It goes the way of every other new "point of emphasis" for officials. These are usually forgotten by December, and we're back to the status quo. Which, in this case, would probably be a good thing.
  2. The NBA will actually enforce this criteria, leading to technical fouls in spades, and a league that's slowly robbed of any of the on-court personality which makes it great.
  3. The NBA actually enforces this criteria, leading to technical fouls in spades, and then David Stern realizes that, in the end, it's probably not a good idea to have every superstar in the league racking up multiple technicals each week. We call this the Cross Traxxion Plan, named for the new basketball that Stern implemented in 2006, only to realize it was a terrible idea, abandoning it two months into the season.

Anyway, after the jump, Joey Crawford demonstrates the criteria with visual aids.

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Joey Crawford: "Oooooo.... Someone's about to get a technical."

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Joey Crawford: "Like this fella. See that wild gesturing? Technical, technical, technical."

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Joey Crawford: "Look at that awful facial hair. Technical, you pretentious bastard."

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Joey Crawford: "Don't play the whole 'good guy' act with me, pal. Technical."

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Joey Crawford: "'Who? Me???' Yes, you. Technical."

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Joey Crawford: "Shrugging your shoulders? You smug sonofabitch... I don't even need to say it."

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Joey Crawford: "No, I don't speak French, Pepe Le Pew. Technical."

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Joey Crawford: "God. If this were 2010... This kind of thing would get you EXECUTED."

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...Say what you want about the new technical rules, but Joey Crawford heartily approves.

(All photos via Getty Images)