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Les Miles On Cam Newton: May Require Invisible Defenders

Cam Newton is exhausting defensive coordinators' options in the SEC West. Blitz him and he'll run through tackles for long gains; hang back in coverage and he gets free reign to move the chains five yards at a time off the zone read. At the moment he's a singular type of doom merchant at quarterback, one that drives coaches to the brink of madness just thinking about how to defend him. 

Some have further to go to that brink than others, however. Some are already quite close to it: 

When asked how he would defend Newton otherwise, Miles respnded, "If I could have a spy no one could see, a guy on the field that didn't count, that would be a great answer."

So the answer to Les miles is easy enough. Just find invisible Jason Bourne, get his hang clean up to 340 pounds or so, and suit him up on Saturday and hope he can tackle Cam Newton. It sound like it makes sense, but don't assume Cam Newton isn't a Predator in disguise, and capable of seeing the invisible defenders in infrared vision.

(This may all seem fantastic, but LSU is undefeated, Florida is unranked, Lane Kiffin has a head coaching job, and Matt Millen is paid to talk about football on television. We're past weird being "weird" in any sense of the word anymore.)