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If Jim Tressel's Out At Ohio State, Who's In?

If Jim Tressel's transgressions do end up getting him canned at Ohio State (and based on these numbers and contractual provisions, it's not like it wouldn't be easy to do), who will fill his shoes (to say nothing of his vest)? Speculation has swirled, of course, around hot retiree Urban Meyer, but almost as quickly as rumors emerge from the soil, they're being mowed down by none other than Meyer's daughter Nicki:


Clear enough, right? But does Miss Meyer care to provide any clues to where her dad might end up coaching again? (Hush before you even begin. Don't even act like the presence of a loving family and a series of cushy TV gigs are going to ever be enough to satisfy our favorite flat-eyed, bipedal mako.)


Oh, no. Oh, no no no. IT'S A SECRET CODE. Remember where Urbz' dream job is, you guys? If we end up having to apologize to Beano Cook after all, we're gonna be pissed.