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Joe Paterno Has Found The Fountain Of Youth

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Somewhere along the way this offseason, Joe Paterno had a late-life crisis. He now has a giant Mac; He uses Skype; And now, Paterno will turn back the clock and call plays for Penn State this season (h/t Black Shoe Diaries).

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"I told the staff, 'Your day in the sun is over,'" Paterno said. "'I'm going to call a lot more plays and lot more defenses and the whole bit, so get ready.'"

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Get out of the way, young whippersnappers: JoePa is back and ready for action. Can't wait 'til Penn State players get their playbooks this year and realize the forward pass has been completely eliminated after being just dialed-back over the last decade.

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