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Why did everyone get all sexual about Johnny Manziel to the Cowboys?

Things got weird.

PFT Commenter's strong takes are presented as parody. Sorry, not sorry. All spelling errors are intentional, we think. -Ed.

Well well well. Maybe they should change his name to Johnny Humbeled after all this.

Were going to see a nother side of Johnny besides the back of his head hovering over a toilet- we're going to see how he bounces back from adversity. No this isnt the type adversty you run into when some scoundrel sneaks a hidden video of you at a Kenny Chesney concert in a private moment of frustation and un-PC-ness. This is much worse. This is adversity that is costing him millions of dollars.

You see if Johnny MANzel wasnt going to be a top 10 pick he could of at least saved face by becoming Jerry Jonses golden boy in big D. Dont believe me? Just ask NFL Media Personalitys Adam Schefter and Mike Florio. Things got weird:

Now if theres one thing I know about Romo hes a brokeback AND his lastname rhymes with a hilarous chant that you can do to make fun of him. I bet hes going to get jealous of everyone saying that Jerrys got a new apple of his eye. But the Browns eye got there hands on him instead.