Dustin Penner is fat, Dustin Penner is lazy, Dustin Penner is slow, Dustin Penner is bad at hockey! These are all criticisms that have been levied at the Kings forward, and his game since arriving in Los Angeles hasn't helped dispel the notion that his best days are behind him.
Such critiques may not be true, but his latest injury isn't going to help change the conventional wisdom that surrounds him. He threw his back out eating his wife's delicious, delicious pancakes.
How'd the back injury happen? Penner told Rich Hammond at LA Kings Insider.
I woke up fine, sat down to eat and it locked right up. It never happened to me before. I couldn't stand up. I was probably at the third stage of evolution. So my wife helped me get dressed, and then I drove to the rink here, to hope they could do some magic and get it opened up. Kinger [trainer Chris Kingsley] just looked at me and said, `Go home.' So I got some treatment and went home.
Apparently it's one of those mysterious things, where you can throw it out (from) sneezing. I just leaned over to dip into some delicious pancakes that my wife made. It's just like it [the pain] wraps around you and squeezes. ... So it was disappointing. Hopefully it's just an isolated incident, and not something that's going to become chronic."
It won't become chronic if Penner just cuts the pancake addiction, but to be fair, they are really good pancakes. Penner has already missed one game -- the Kings loss against Columbus on Saturday -- and could miss Monday night's contest against Washington, too.