The San Jose Sharks have not been home much this season and their fans are starting to miss them. For that matter, the Sharks are probably starting to miss them.
San Jose has played 22 games this season with 16 of them being on the road. The team has already had two road trips of five games or more and just wrapped up a six-game road trip where they lost to the Buffalo Sabres, Columbus Blue Jackets and Florida Panthers.
Now, I know that murder's row sounds tough but ...
The Sharks' woes can finally end on Thursday night when the team begins a seven-game home stand to close out November and begin December.
San Jose isn't bad enough to earn a real McDavid McMoment this week, but they get an honorary title of being the inaugural McMade-up Connor McDavid McNeeds to Go Home Award.
That's your HOME! Are you too good for your HOME, Sharks?
Let's get to the rankings:
The Connor Mc'Doh! Of The Week: Dallas Stars
Awarded weekly to the team trying its hardest to fall into the McDavid sweepstakes.
The Stars are the most exciting team in hockey, said everyone before the hockey actually started. Now, the Stars are only exciting if you like watching one line. Tyler Seguin is leading the NHL in goals, which will be a thing we say several times in the coming years. Jason Spezza is second on the team in points and leads the Stars in assists.
Jamie Benn is third on the team in points and recently ended a goal drought that involved many zeros:
Everybody likes the Stars. Everybody wants the Stars to do well. Except the Stars aren't doing well, and their 2-7-0 record in November is proof enough of that.
At least they can take solace in Benn and Seguin being the best bros in hockey:
The Connor McBlowout Of The Week: Toronto Maple Leafs
Awarded weekly to the team that suffered the NHL's most demoralizing loss.
The Maple Leafs lost to the Sabres on Saturday, 6-2. They followed it up with a 9-2 loss to the Nashville Predators on Tuesday. Toronto is burning to the ground right now.
Steve Simmons: "Did you consider any other team for the McBlowout this week?"
Me: "Fuck no."
The Connor McDon't Need Him: Montreal Canadiens
Awarded weekly to the team that just doesn't need McDavid's help, and definitely won't get it anyway.
While Toronto burns, Montreal sings the praises of a six-game win streak. Sure, it's over already but you can never take away those heady days when all the Canadiens did was win and win and win and win and win and win.
Having lost three straight, the Canadiens began their extended streak of wins with a
boring awful narrow defeat of the Buffalo Sabres. That culminated in Montreal earning the top spot in the NHL. Where they belong. Because they are THE Original Six franchise. And nothing Jeff Marek or Keith Olbermann says can change that.
The Connor McNeed To Rig The Draft Lottery: Philadelphia Flyers
Awarded weekly to a bad team that's not quite bad enough to actually land McDavid in the draft ... unless, of course, the lottery balls go their way.
Ugh, the Flyers. The Flyers. THE FLYERS.
This team does everything imaginable to drive
me the hockey world crazy. First, they had that whole Twitter drama about whether Claude Giroux would play on Wednesday -- a drama, which they themselves orchestrated -- and then they got beat handily by the Rangers and then Ron Hextall yelled at the team within ear shot of the media and denied ever doing it.
You know what else Ron Hextall would do in public and then lie about? Tank his damn season to draft Conor McDavid.
The Connor McFront Runner Of The Week: Edmonton Oilers
Awarded weekly to the team that, as of right now, has the best chance of landing Connor McDavid in the 2015 Draft.
I miss the comfort in being sad.
-Kurt Cobain, "Frances Farmer will have her revenge on Seattle"
Kurt Cobain was probably an Oilers fan.
The Oilers have looked promising at times this season and many people smarter than I have been saying their possession numbers show the team should start trending up. As someone interested in following bad teams this season, I've had a chance to watch the Oilers several times this year and, honestly, they're actually a lot of fun to watch on most nights.
Like when they play short-handed for no reason:
But that doesn't change that they're still not winning games and that they sit two points above Buffalo for last place.
Embrace the sadness, Edmonton. Kurt Cobain did and look at where that got him okay nevermind.
The Connor McMatchup Of Next Week
Set your DVRs/PVRs!
If you have / see / hear a Connor McDavid McHockey Moment this week, be sure to pass it along in the comments section, by tweeting me @mattbrigidi or by emailing me at email@example.com.