More Twitter goodness today, although this time it's not from a player's wife: Manchester United striker Wayne Rooney has responded to @sam_oldham_LFC making bizarre threats* via Twitter by challenging himself to a fight:
@WayneRooney I'll put u asleep within 10 seconds u little girl. Don't say stuff and not follow up on it. I'll be waiting
But don't worry, Rooney doesn't just want to fight himself! @sam_oldham_LFC is also on the list:
@sam_oldham_LFC I will put u asleep within 10 seconds hope u turn up if u don't gonna tell everyone ur scared u little nit. I'll be waiting
Rather sensibly, @sam_oldham_LFC has deleted his account rather than have the tar beaten out of him by Rooney, who later dismissed the exchange as a bit of harmless banter. Apparently threatening to smash one's skull into small pieces with a golf club is an endearing trait in Wayne Rooney's strange world, albeit one that will result in a punch to the face.
*i.e. "Rooney ya fat w***e ill smash ya head in with a pitchin wedge an bury ya with a ballast fork ya fat ugly lil n***e."