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Colorado Rapids coach Pablo Mastroeni has amaaaaaazing facial hair

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Look at this. LOOK AT THIS. Has anyone ever combined 'refined gentleman' and 'pirate' so well? Pablo Mastroeni is a hero of facial hair and this is a marvel of facial hair engineering.

Also, pretty great team color tie decision. Everything about him is wonderful. He's even better at looking great than he was at making crunching tackles.