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The Solid Verbal: Instead of players, let's draft weird college football... things!

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You read that correctly, we're drafting narratives and doing it with gusto!

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Kevin Jairaj-USA TODAY Sports

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In this year's Solid Verbal Fantasy College Football Things draft, we select a squad of ongoing storylines and narratives, including:

• A team not getting enough respect

• Where a coach went to school

• The consumption of alcohol

• Coaching rumors

• Garbage PR from college football administrators

• Unwarranted hype

• Unnecessary TV shows

• Attrition from a great program

• This year's out-of-nowhere team

• Second guessing a major coach

• Lines from a coach to placate fans

• Future draft stock

• Coaches feuding

• Drooling fanboys

• Dancing

• TV guests

• A do-or-die situation

• Players constantly leaving a certain program

...and more!